1) "Don't lick her hair!"
-coworker to boy who had just, well...licked someone's hair
2) "Excuse me fair lady, but have you seen Sir George Washington? Clearly I have time traveled to the future and he is nowhere to be found."
-one of my students to me during recess
3) "It just feels like there is charcoal in my butt"
- one of my students to me in response to the question "Are you feeling okay?"
4) "Dear A,
I hate your stinkin guts. I hope your marry the floor.
- one students to another on a note I caught them passing
5) "I had a bad day yesterday"-student
"Why is that?" -me
"Our car caught on fire when we were inside of it." -student (as nonchalantly as one could be)
Don't you wish your workplace was this entertaining?